Lost and Found

Phantom and Romance...

2007-01-24T17:28:00.000-08:00

There are some experiences in life that will remain with you for ever. Some things that touch you so deeply that they alter your very being, touching that fleeting thing at your core that some call a soul. In my final year of elementary school my class was taken to see Andrew Loyd Weber’s “Phantom of the Opera.”
I never expected what happened, I never expected to enjoy the play and was of the opinion it was something that I was being forced into. By the opening act of the Operetta the hair on the back of my neck was standing on end, I was riveted and could not bare to look away. The performance was nothing short of magical.
Why might you be wondering am I relating this tale to you few people out there who read this blog on occasion? I find myself thinking hopelessly romantically of late and I to me the romance story of the last century. What more do you need than a hero that is also the villain? A hero that risks all for love and has it thrown in his face when the object of his affection is smitten with another? And the ultimate sacrifice for love in releasing the object of you affection so that they might truly be happy?
Not that I have done any of the above with in the recent months, but I think that I as I grow older I realize fitfully only how much I am a hopeless romantic. As for those of you who have never seen the Phantom live… or are too young to have seen it… go out and rent the film.
To this day the songs and music still hold me spell bound and give me goose bumps.
http://ca.movies.yahoo.com/movie/1800385821/info (the movie link)

Thoughts of Self.

2006-11-19T17:00:00.000-08:00

Do you ever question why it is that we do the things that we do. Some times we run when we should stand, stand when we should duck, duck when we should weave or shy away from something that might have been good for us. I cannot explain it; all I know is that I sometimes sit and reflect on the many decisions I have made that are opposite to everything that an outsider might have viewed as a logical or rational decision. The say self reflection provides us a window into our pasts and allows the experiences we have had to shape our decisions in the future. I can’t help but wonder though that if this is having a negative effect though, not just on me but on all those I know and those that I don’t. People pass judgment today so quickly and without a second thought; judgments that are based on social norms that we have internalized, judgments based on our past experiences and subjective thought on experiences we have heard about. I cannot help but think that I have passed up opportunities, relationship or adventures because I was too jaded by my inhibitions to just try something out. Inhibitions that have been established and cemented by my fears. Fears that have been created by past experience and irrational worries. I think when I reflect on everything that I have done and every time I have backed away from the edge of a decision that might have consequences there has been one single overarching theme to all my choice. I am not afraid that if I jump how far or fast I will fall, but of where I will land and how it will change my position in the world that I have created for myself.

Human Spirit

2006-08-31T11:24:00.000-07:00

I am not one to believe in there being a God such as the church defines it. The exception is that I do believe in the human spirit, in our ability to overcome, in our ability to become something better and believe in each other. The key to this in my humble opinion is love and sharing that we have for each other.
A couple years back I participated in a couple of triathlons with my father and enjoyed the feeling of completing something with him that seemed to create a bond of love in sportsmanship.
While surfing through the internet looking at different triathlon websites I came across this story. The Hoyt’s from the United States, a father and son combination that have been running marathons and triathlons for years now. As you can see they are not the average father and son. It simply started when his father ran a marathon pushing his son and afterwards his son told him that he had felt free as if he where competing by himself. Since then they have competed repeatedly, even finishing an iron man together.
This to me is a true testimonial of love that is shared between two human beings, the love between parent and child, and the inability to let any challenge over come their dreams.
I think we could all learn a lesson from these two.
www.break.com/index/a_fathers_love.html

Listen to the Music and Dance!

2006-08-17T10:43:00.000-07:00

Ever notice that once and while a band comes out with a song that resonates through you, that grips something deep inside your being? Their words echoing thoughts, feelings, states of being, moments in time that are part of you and not just parts that are in the past, but the present and your dreams of the future.
Well recently I have become acutely aware to the fact that when I hear a song that has that effect on me I have to get the CD and own that musical track post haste. The challenge is to understand what tracks are expressing which part of our beings.
For those who are curious here are just a few tracks that influence and move me:

1. World on Fire – Sarah McLachlan (http://www.worldonfire.ca/) – my aspired future
2. Falling for the first time – Bare Naked Ladies – Maroon – my past and present
3. Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol – the story of my romantic life
4. Magaienha - Sergio Mendes – Dance with Me Soundtrack – my passion for life

Well that is enough insight into myself on the web, for those who know me perhaps this will give you a little more insight or just make you question why you are friends with such a nut. Either way, I love these tracks and many more, maybe the next time we drink together I will let you in on a few more if you quiz me. In the end, life without music would not be half as interesting. Life without music would equate to a life without dance… and… In the dance of life, love can happen in a heartbeat.

Summer Thoughts...

2006-08-15T22:13:00.000-07:00

Well folks I have been remiss in my blogging, but then I have not exactly been home since my cousins wedding. After my cousin got hitched I was off on a world wind tour literally! I spent two months going through Western (Spain, Portugal and France), Central (Italy, UK, Germany, etc) and Eastern (Hungary, Austria) Europe. After that I was home for a brief stay before jetting off to Vancouver BC for a couple weeks and then I was off to Halifax for my friend Dan’s wedding. (Congrats Dan and Andrea!)
So you ask “Did he put this blog up to brag about his jet setting summer?”
Well maybe there is a little of that in this post, but I mostly put it up to express the marvel that I feel after spending my summer traveling. It is a true wonder, a truly dwarfing experience to journey the world and see where it is we have come from and gain insight into where it is we may be going.
As a child I felt the world was so small, that my place in it was central and that all things truly in some way affected me and that in turn I affected them. Ignorance is bliss! Now only do I understand that in order to truly make a difference that one has to stand up, stand strong and pursue a course of action that will enable one to influence the world around them. Call it my fortune cookie wisdom or the ranting of a youthful mind, but I think that I have in my late 20s experienced a metamorphosis and I have come out of it more in tune with who I am as an individual.
The bottom line is that it took me a while to see the wisdom that my best friend saw coming out of high school. That sometimes in order to achieve the things we want most in life we have to sacrifice some of the things that grant us short term pleasure with nominal gains. That we have to set a goal for ourselves, but be mindful of the steps in the journey that have to be taken to get there, to take those steps one at a time and if we trip to get back up and dust ourselves off. My high school art teacher said it best…
“Do the little things well and the big things will take care of themselves.” Berkley Brean.
All I say “Is never stop dreaming and reaching for the stars, because in your reaching you might just touch the sky…”

Weekend Wedding...

2006-05-29T06:19:00.000-07:00

I am a hopeless romantic! My cousin got married this weekend and it was a beautiful ceremony, she looked amazing in her dress and her daughter stole the show. As I watched my little second cousin and my cousin during the course of the day I found myself realizing that I deep down wanted to have the same experience. Not for the glamour or the attention, not even really for the ceremony, but what made me pause was my little cousin Abby. You can see the love that she has brought into this world, there is a sparkle in everyone’s eyes when she is around.
Well I guess that means that to my laundry list of hopes, dreams and goals in my life I am adding the wish to some day be a husband and a father.

Deep thoughts during class...

2006-04-01T19:22:00.000-08:00

Waiting, staring at the clock, waiting! Something has to happen soon, something needs to happen soon! My own voice is screaming in my ears. "What are they holding off on? Why am I here? I could be doing something more productive right now, instead of this waiting! Where did my life go? How did I arrive at this point? Why for heavens sake am I waiting? Is this really it? This is all there is to life? A simple series of events strung together with bouts of waiting inbetween? This can't be it... I must be in the wrong place..."
My eyes are red, my head is spinning; I can feel my heard pounding on the inside of my rib cage as if it were attempting to escape, my pulse pounds over every inch of my body in rythmic waves. I am sitting on the edge of my seat, I feel disconnected and almost drunk. My skin is clammy, I feel sick to my stomach, my legs won't stop moving, my thoughts are fleeting. I am shaking like a leaf in a thunderstorm with gail like winds. I am awake, I am alert and I am very aware of every second that drips away into oblivion never to be reclaimed in the expanse of time. Oceans of time, that we become more aware of as we get older, an awareness that drives us to want to stand out and not become some meaningless forgotten drop. My drive is set, my goals are in place and yet I am doubting everything and feeling nothing.
Glance at the clock, seconds ticking, dropping away from the face. splashing away into nothing. Time always moves faster when you wish it would stop.
My feet are pumping, hands are tembling, teeth are grinding. Hurry, its not too late, I still can salvage the day, maybe I can catch the last drop before its too late.
Damn, maybe I really shouldn't have had that third extra large coffee...

Underworld Evolved? What a rental...

2006-01-24T21:42:00.000-08:00

Have you ever looked forward to a sequal so much that time blurred and its release seemed nearly on your door step? Well I am admittedly a movie geek and admit that I have had this happen a few times. Movies like X-men, Spiderman, The Matrix, Star Wars Episodes 1-6, just to name a couple. Well the Matrix did slide a little towards the end, loosing what the orginal wow'd us with, but still it was interesting enough to make me pause and think. As for the lastest move I had been awaiting, well all I can say is if I ever met Les Wiseman I will shake his wifes hand and then turn and piss on him.

Why you might ask? During my second year in the Armed Forces, 2003, a movie trailer anounced the coming of the movie Underworld. A story of a a fued or Ancient war that lurked beneath the surface of our mortal world, a fight for control between vampires and werewolves. The trailer left myself and my barracks mates counting down days and hours untill we could eagerly stand in line to present our money to a vendor just to see this story, and was it worth it? Well in order to see the movie first let me explain that it cost us a forty dollar cab ride to get in from the base and yet another forty to go home, add that to the price of the movie and refershments while we where there and you have yourself a 120 dollar evening. Now was this movie worth it? We not only paid once, not twice... no we came off base to see this movie three times!!! Each time we revelled in it, talked about it and dreamt about it. Yes, yes, we are nerds, but you need to know that as soilders we did not have a lot to keep ourselves occupied. I have to pay homage as well to the man who created this amazing movie, a Mr. Kevin Grevioux. This man can be attributed to the success of this first film, making it everything a movie should be and having those of us that paid to see it walk out feeling a sense of glee about what we have experienced.

Now I must move forward three years, to the year 2006 and to a different time and reality. I am now a student in university, struggling in pursute of a higher education so that I might fulfill some higher purpose, but not to get caught up in this. My point is that my time is finite and I must pick and choose how to spend my leasure time, which I have precious little of. Tonight I decided to break from my home work, to walk away from my books to see the sequal to a movie that has found its home in my personal collection of DVDs. I went to see Underworld Evolution, a movie that promotions promised and history framed to be a event that I would log in my memory as one of those moments of movie glee. Instead after sitting thru the movie I found myself compelled to come home and blog about just how crappy it was! The movie took everything that Kevin left behind, the possible success that could have been recreated and pissed it all away. After a little research via Yahoo I seem to have located the cause, the director turned wannabe writter Mr. Len Wiseman. Seems that the orginal writters who were a team of individuals didn't make a come back on this movie event, Mr. Wiseman wrote and directed all by his big bad self. Well... bad may be too nice a word for his skills as a two year old with a colouring book and a broken crayon if given two years could come up with a better plot. As for his directing, well he seems to be loosing his touch on that too, as the movies cinimatography is boarderline nausea inducing. Too many loop holes are left in this movie, too many areas that could have been expanded on left untouched and too much filler put in to prop up Mr. Wisemans lack of creativity. Should anyone read this blog before seeing the movie, save yourself the trouble and wait for it on rental, go to the box office for something bettter.

If Kate Beckinsale, Scott Speedman, Bill Nighy, Kevin Grevioux or any other actor / writter / participant who was in either of the above films sees this, hats off to you who manage to preform so well and entertain us all.
Should Len Wiseman see it... maybe you should consider letting Kate act and retire! Damn you for ruining this story!

Current Roomie (Awesome Roomie)

2006-01-21T17:03:00.000-08:00

Ryan "Happy - Man" Gamble

Do you ever stop smiling? Or did your face get stuck that way?
"Hey guys, where is the prozac?"

Former Roomie (Married Roomie)

2006-01-21T16:34:00.000-08:00

HALO BROCK HARRISON!!!
"LAG U, FRAG U!!!"

My Vote won't matter...

2006-01-21T10:32:00.000-08:00

"I am not voting, I don't care..."
"I am not voting, what does it matter..."
"I am not voting, I am not registered..."
"I am not vointg, my vote doesn't matter anyhow!"
"I am not voting, no parties are worth it..."
"I am not voting... I don't know how and its an inconvience..."

How many times have I heard this from people I know. How many times have you heard this from people you might know? There is a mass of people in this country that live under the idea that voting is not worth the effort or the time. The number of bogus reasons that I hear blows me away. I don't flog my opinion on who to vote for to these people, but I do try to explain that every vote counts.
Non voting is like a virus... first 1 person doesn't vote... then another... then another... spreading from person to person. By the time the stats come in after each election there is a sharp ratio between the population of this country and the number of people who cast their votes.
In the end, it speaks loudly of the people who voice an opinion on the future of this country and those who are just happy enough to live here.
What gets my goat though is when I listen to some one who has a venoment opinion on the policies of a government in power or a party that is in this election, yet when asked has either not voted or is planning not to vote (with one of the lame excuses above). To these people I now say... you didn't express this opinion when it mattered most, when it would have made a difference no matter how small. Bottom line to me is, if you do not vote or spoil a vote, then you do not have the right to complain about the results of an election or a government in power. You didn't voice your opinion when it counted, so don't waste peoples time with your opinion now.

An End to a Progressive Canada?

2006-01-18T09:12:00.000-08:00

Well this is my first blog... and what is my first topic? Well I figured I might as well jump the band wagon and post my thoughts on the upcoming election.

So what do I think? Well up untill this year I was a entrenched Liberal... scoffing at any other party and towing the party line. I felt the Liberal's were making Canada into a country that was progressive, that human rights and freedoms were unparalleled and that they were pushing the envelope. I had no idea that the envelope being pushed just happened to be full of cash and was being pushed towards all the wrong things under the table. The Liberals claim responsiblity for the upsurge in our economy... HELLO! Our economy has done that with very little government assistance... that is like when Al Gore tried to tell the world he was the inventor of the internet... The bottom line is I will not vote LIberal, not because they are not moving in the right direction with their ideas.... I will not vote for them because they have the right ideas, but are not moving anywhere...

Now the New Blue.... the conservatives.... Steven Harper? Do I vote for him? Do I hop on that train? I have talked to some of my friends that are voting Conservative just to spite the Liberals. They think that this vote will cause a change and take power away from the corupt Liberals, and they are partially right. The Liberals are not really worthy of power anymore... but do we give the power to a bunch of people whose ideas belong in the early 20th century? Harper's ideas are to throw money at Canadians to distract them from the long term losses they will suffer with his party. Here is a GST cut... but you're going to have to pay for your health care. Here, tax cuts for the big corporations, because that is what they really need. Oh, and lets reopen the gay marriage issue because we want a fair vote... a vote that made our country progressive and made many citizens proud to be Canadian... we need to be looking forward and moving that way.... not reopening old issue because they didn't go the way we wanted them to. Strangely reminds me of a kid throwing a fit.
And speaking as a former soilder... Harper would have sent me to War, to fight in Iraq for oil...
A fight that is unjust and is only tolerated due to media spin... Canada is not a world policing country like our neighbours to the south... We help when asked, hence our proud history as peace keepers... not peace makers...
And speaking of Oil... Harper would have us throw away the Koyoto agreement... because it is unrealistic according to his party... is it really? Or are we just to accustom to our polluting and gas burning ways... maybe Harper should just ask his buddy Bush in the states to push the button and launch the nukes instead of drawing out the death of the planet...
Harper is obviously planning for the short term future of this country and this planet... I will not vote for that....

Thus I am down to two parties to choose from... Go Green or Go NDP...
I guess since I am interested in what is best for the people living in this country I will make a choice that benefits them directly... I will choose a party that will not make Health Care private and will give the lower income earners the much neeed income tax cut they need.
Thus I will cast my vote for one of the two parties above, hoping and praying that if Harper does win, that there will be a minority to keep him in check.